Dear Body: I Love You

The Emotions of Betrayal

Thoughts of betrayal give rise to a variety of very intense emotions.  Anger, hatred, distrust and fear are but a few of the many feelings accompanying any act of betrayal.  What happens when a woman feels betrayed by her own body?  Do the emotions change?  Are they different?  Apparently not.  The same emotions are aimed inwardly as would be fired outwardly and the damage can be devastating.

I Hate My Body

Infertility takes a toll physically and emotionally on women as they grapple with the questions and possible treatments involved with the inability to conceive and/or carry a pregnancy to term.  Inadequacy as a woman, fear of rejection and loneliness, are all part of the painful emotional equation this condition brings with it.  Many women condemn their bodies, cursing them for their inability to perform properly.  Believing their bodies are not working "right", they heap insults and degrading remarks upon themselves and their reproductive organs.  In cases of infertility, it is not that difficult to think of the body as defective and treat it as a separate entity of betrayal and target it for hateful remarks.

Science Agrees

These days science, psychology and mind/body philosophy are coming more and more into agreement as methods begin to overlap and results from one discipline are accepted in others.  It is a well-known fact that the mind has great power over the body, and the results of research and actual practice are extensive and positive.  Science is backing up many of the concepts once thought of as "airy-fairy" and over-the-top.  By changing some of the ways a person thinks and speaks, they can affect some wonderful peace and changes in their bodies.  While there is no guarantee of conception, understanding that the body a person has at this moment in time is the only one they will ever have and that no one outside can take care of it for them, may open a door to change.

Love the One You Are With...

Love the one you are with...the words to a song from many years ago.  Yes, loving the one you are with would mean loving yourself because you get to take you along wherever you go.  Love is an action more than a feeling.  By treating the body and all its functions with care, speaking to it the way you would speak to a friend or family member you love very much, the positive feelings begin.  Understanding and patience replace frustration and anger and a quiet acceptance can lead the way to seeking answers without anxiety.

None of this precludes the realities a woman has to deal with when contending with infertility.  However, treating the body in such a way as to tend to and care for its needs in a gentle manner makes the day to day struggles a little easier to cope with.  When one considers how much the body has endured through thoughtless treatment, it is amazing it has lasted as long as it has.  Give credit where credit is due, and when the machinery does not work so well, find out what is wrong and take care of the matter with thoughtfulness and love.