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Male Infertility
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Tracy1
 January 10th, 2008 3:10 AMReport

Hi,

just thought I would share my story with others and hopefully get some feedback.

I am curious as to why anyone has had to do IVF.
Do you have the fertility problem or your husband?

I am 33. My husband is 43. My husband and I tried to concieve for 3 years before seeking help and realising my husband had a low count. Although it wasn't impossible that we would concieve naturally we were told that considering my age and health, our chances with IVF were 50% amd the best chance of having a baby in the immediate future so after another year of trying we decided on IVF.

In the meantime my husband researched the internet and found a supplement called Fertility Blend for Men which he took for 6 months.

When commencing IVF my husband did a few samples and his count and motility had risen dramatically.
On the day we went in for the egg collection and he gave his sample, they said his levels were perfect.

So, chances are we may have been successful if we continued to keep trying although the stress of trying in the end was exhausting. And it's a relief to have the pressure and stress relieved and be so relaxed and happy now we are finally expecting our first.
We are hoping we will be successful naturally with a second but if not we still have 2 embryos but happy if we do only have 1!!

I was also quite hurt at some peoples attitude towards our choice to commence IVF. People disaproved because I was doing IVF younger than most wimen but we could have kept trying and found ourselves in the same situation a few years down the track, which by when I was a few years older, my chances would have decreased and perhaps my health so we decided to do it while our chances were so good.

Tracy

bdantonio
 January 10th, 2008 8:08 AMReport

Tracy i would not worry about what people think, especially when it comes to age. I was 20 years old when i found out i would have to go through fertility, fertility doesnt care of your age.


Marina
 January 10th, 2008 12:56 PMReport

Tracy,
Beth is absolutely right,and I just want to add-most people have no clue what IVF exactly is,they just heard "something" here and there and many will talk behind your back-"o,yea,will see if child is normal"
That's why my DH and I never told anyone,(exept my bf,who went thru IVF also)even immidiete family,HOW we got PG.We don't want to know what other people think and try to defend ourselfs,so, all they know-it just happened and it's good enough explanation.I don't want any pity from other people who get PG by looking at man's pants...But tell or not tell people-it's your personal choice-ours was not to.

mjforney
 February 6th, 2008 5:40 PMReport

Tracey:
One reminder: THIS IS YOUR LIFE, and no one else's to live. Some people are lucky enough to be fertile myrtle's and some of us have to work real hard and spend all kinds of $$$$... We spent $65,000 to get prego over the past 5 years!

My dh has no sperm and people really threw their oinions at us because we purchased donor sperm after having my dh matched w/the donor. People think that we are "messing with God's plan".... My answer to that is
"IF GOD DID NOT WANT US TO HAVE THIS BABY THAN HE WOULD HAVE NEVER CREATED FERTILITY DOCTOR'S AND SPERM BANKS........" That usually shuts them up; than I tell them to mind their own business! hehe!

Enjoy and embrace your IVF choice.... It is worth every penny and moment and it just makes us all stronger people!!! :)

**Hugs**

bdantonio
 February 6th, 2008 11:44 PMReport

Tracy i am a hair dresser so you know gossip city. I was doing a ladys hair and she was reading a article on infertility and she made the comment to me that women who cant conceive need to just get over it. Well needles to say i gave her a piece of mind.I told her who was she to tell me that i should not have a child. If my eggs and my husbands sperm can do it then who is she to tell us no. When people are in renal faliure no one says oh well they will just die lets not get them a kidney transplant do they. I told her that my daughter was the product of infertility drugs and if she didnt like it she could kiss my butt. I asked her right out who she thought she was to tell me i should not have children. Then she brouight up its gods choice . Well hun i go to church and know the bible. It states that every man and women were put on this planet for a reason and how the hell did she know that the fertility doctors and researchers were not put here to help create a more pure human. One wanted out of love, desire, and to grow up with all choices. I asked her so gods plan is for 12-18yr old girls to get pregnate and throw them away and abort them. She did not talk to me the rest of the service and mindless to say she never came back to me. This is a choice that we make. God made us the way we are and he created infertility doctors and researched to help us fix his mistake.---- Dont sweat what others say i sure dont.


twinmama
 July 14th, 2008 11:11 AMReport

Right on ladies!!!!

I was so distraught at first over all these same things. But yes, surgeons and Dr.s have been gifted with this ability to help us.

Donors are available to let people who will be wonderful parents conceive.

I tell people that any asshole can get someone pregnant and does not mean he will be a good father. Not all "natural" pregnancies seem to be in God's plan, especially when you think about all the "oops!" situations, and people who get married because of an "accident".

People can be cruel and judgemental. I think in our children's generation they will have friends that came from IVF and it will be no big deal.

When we teach our kids sex ed we will tell them about ALL the ways people can get pregnant.

Needless to say, we are hush hush about using a donor sperm. My DH is still feeling the blow to his manhood and it's just not public right now except for our moms. We will tell the kids when they can understand. No secrets. If they want to tell their friends and family after that then we will be over it all by then!


bdantonio
 July 14th, 2008 2:46 PMReport

DNA does not make a daddy. My father had a plaque when we were growing up that saind and man can be a father but it takes someone special to be a daddy. THis plaque all came about due to my youngest brother.
My youngest brother was my fathers 1st wives child. When she had him she still had my dads last name (my maiden name) Well when he was born she could not take care of him and his bilolgical father could not be found my father took him in and raised him. To this day my father and mother are is parents, to him. He knows that he does not have their DNA. He tells people that love is thicker then blood. I never tell people he is not my brother or hes my step brother, We dont have steps in our home. I have two brothers as far as im concrened. My children have two uncles with no exceptions. Does not make it any different from donor or anything. Anyone can be a parent it takes someone special to be a mommy and daddy.